Munguva pfupi yapfuura, yakauya nechinyorwa ichi chakaitika kuti United Kingdom inyika yakasarudzika. Ndakaverenga uye ndakafunga. Muchokwadi, nyika dzese dziri muzviro. Ini nemurume wangu taive muLondon gore rapfuura uye handigoni kutaura kuti vagari vemubatiri vehasha vakasiyanawo zvakasiyana nesu.
Ehe, zvirokwazvo kune dzimwe misiyano mune hunhu, maitiro uye mukukurukurirana, asi izvi zvakasikwa. Iyo yeBritish yakaunzwa uye yakarangwa, inonyanya kunzwiwa mumibvunzo. Ini nemurume wangu takaenda kubhangi uye mutsetse wakanaka wakamiswa. Ini handifarire queue, uye mumwe wangu haafarire zana nguva kusimba. Saka kana isu tiri pamwe nemumwe wangu, ipapo munhu wese akamira zvakadzikama uye akazvibata. Sezvo takamira pamaminitsi gumi, takapupurira mufananidzo wakasarudzika kuti isu kazhinji tinokwanisa kucherechedzwa kwese kwese. Saka, London, Bank, mutsara. Masuo akavhurika uye mukadzi anobhururuka, zvakajeka nyika dzinoshatisa, anoongorora misodzi yose, inogadzira nzira yekubuda, inowana zvaanoda uye mashizha. Takavhunduka! Queue haana kana kutorwa! Fungidzira? Maximum izvo zvaakaita, zviri mubelique anotarisa kumashure. Uku ndiko kujekerwa!
Kuwedzera pakufumurwa, iyo British ine yakakwirira chikamu chekuremekedza. Pano it tsika kuvhura pamberi pemasuo ese uye kusvetuka mberi. Ndakanyora zvese, izvo hazvisizvo, kwete zvinoenderana pasi. MaBritish ari kunyemwerera zvakanyanya, seJapan. MuUK, itsika yekutaura nekunyemwerera kunyange nezvezvinhu zvinosiririsa. Unoziva here kuti nei? Chinhu icho ndechekuti kunyemwerera kunoonekwa chiratidzo chepfungwa, uye mhuka dzinosiririsa dzinopa munhu ane kugona kwepfungwa anogona kubvunzwa.
Kukwazisa kunosimbiswa nemaoko, pakati pevanhu nepakati pevakadzi. Mumashoko ese ezuva nezuva, mazwi emashiripiti anowanzonzwika - Kutenda, ndapota, urombo uye zvichingodaro. ZVINOKOSHA! MuCafe kana muresitorendi, kana kuti pane, vazhinji vavo, itsika kubhadhara iyo oda ipapo. Kana iwe uine rombo rakanaka uye iwe uchapinda muChirungu
Kufanana nedzimwe nyika, iyo Briteni haifarire kana muhupenyu hwavo hwega, vausingazivi vanotanga kupindira. Kunyangwe kana uchinyatsoda kupa zano kumugari wenzvimbo, ramba uye ratidza kusagadzikana. Zvakare, ini handikurudzire kukanganisa musoro wezvematongerwo enyika, mari uye kudana vagari veUK havasi iyo yeBritish, asi iyo British.
Zvipfuyo munyika ino zvinogara munharaunda yehunhu, saka iwe unenge uchingoda kudzidza kutaura nezve hamsters semuenzaniso, mune iyo manyorerwo akanaka anovhenekera pachena. Ini ndaimboda mhuka dzangu zhinji kwazvo, asi mushure mekunge katsi yangu yandaida yakanyangarika, rudo rwangu uye kunyangwe tsitsi yakaenda kumhuka dzese. Asi ndangariro chinhu chinoshamisa, sezvaakandibatsira pano.
Chinyorwa icho chakanyorwa pamusoro pekutanga, ndakaverenga kuti muUK yaisave tsika kubvunza mibvunzo yezvezviitiko zvemukati. Izvo zvinomanikidzwa kusabvumirana, nekuti kana ukauya mumugwagwa kune vanopfuura uye vatanga kuvabvunza nezve kana ivo vari kurara mangwanani uye kangani, zvakasikwa kuti iwe unogona kukutumira iwe izvozvo. Asi kana neBritish kana british ikaita shamwari, ivo vanovhura kwazvo uye nyaya yebonde yavo haina kurambidzwa. Saka, semuenzaniso, murume akasangana nemurume, ngatifonei Joe. Joe chaizvo, mushure mevhiki yeushamwari, kuve mumamiriro ezvinhu akasvinura uye gadziriro yakakwana yeMweya, akatiudza gore rapfuura akashanyira mahombekombe eNudist, uye paujaya hwake aive nhengo yeSwinger Club. Ziva kuti zvese izvi zvakanzi inzwi remuzuva nezuva, iro rakatipeta newawakaroora mumusha wechiedza. Joe ndiye munhu akasarudzika, ane chitoro chake, ari murume akafirwa, mwanasikana mukuru uye zvichingodaro. Es chete kubva pakuonekwa kwake, ndinogona kutaura kuti maBritish akazarura vanhu vaunogona kutaura navo chero nyaya.
Kusvuta muUK haina kufarirwa zvakanyanya phenomenon uye kurwisa nenzira dzose. Hazvibviri kuputa munzvimbo dzeveruzhinji. Paunenge uchiita mukamuri muhotera, zviri nani kubvunza pachine nguva, kungave kuri kuita kuputa mazviri. Kuwedzera pakuputa, muUK inotungamira kurwa neinwiwa zvinwiwa, sezvo zvinonakidza Aborigine, vanodzinga manheru emunharaunda mumaPubs, makirabhu, maresitorendi nemaresitorendi. Doro racho riri padoro risina kutengeswa kusvikira gumi nematana manheru emavhiki uye kubva pazuva gumi nemaviri ezuva kusvika kumatatu manheru kusvika hafu yegumi negumi nerimwe usiku, pakupera kwevhiki. Doro uye zvigadzirwa zvefodya, vana havatengere.
Kupfeka muUK, iwe unogona mune chero hembe dzaunonyanya kufarira, chinhu chinonyanya kukosha chaungazonzwa wakasununguka mairi. Iko kusarudzika ndeye mafuru majasi uye chero zvigadzirwa zvakagadzirwa neyekare fur. Izvo hazvizokubhadhariswa uye uchakurova iwe hazvingadaro, asi pendi kubva pane inogona, zana muzana rapotsi vachipamba basa rako rekutora kwei yako.
Matipi anopiwa, uye muhuwandu hwegumi muzana. Izvi zvinoshanda kumaresitorendi. Mazano achiri kupihwa mutero. Pano iwe unogona kupa ese gumi muzana uye pound imwe. Iyo tsika yekupa mazano muhuwandu hwehafu yepaundi imwe chete yakachinjirwa sutukesi. Iyo ndiyo tsika yekubva matipi uye kune vhudzi. Kana iwe wanga uchida basa raTenzi, nyanzvi yake uye zvichingodaro, ipapo iwe unogona kutenda vhudzi, uchimusiya mapaundi maviri emazano. Mazano haatorwe kusiya nzvimbo mbiri chete - pubs uye kudzora.
Varume vedu, vane tsika inonakidza kwazvo - usinei nemugwagwa. Usaedze kuita izvi mumigwagwa yeLondon. British yezviitiko zvakadaro, takura zviketwe muhomwe yake, kana musina. Kufambawo mukati memigwagwa yeLondon, edza kuzvibata zvakadzikama, kwakaramba kuchidzoreredza uye kuseka zvakanyanya. Pamusoro pekuseka kukuru, maBritain anogona kupa mhosva uye kushandisa kutaura kukuru, kunyanya kana iwe uchiridza runhare mbozha. Usaite kuti mhuka isingazivikanwe kubva kuBritraons dzirikufunda nehanya padyo, hazvizozvifarire kune chero munhu. Usanyengeterera vafambi, uye kana paine kudikanwa kwekubvunza mubvunzo, saka zviite zvine hungwaru uye neruremekedzo.